back-gnawers)) [18 Dec 2009|12:05am] rrrenta Well. I could never possibly fancy me writing this kind of stuff at all... Or will I ever be writing this sort of things futher in my life... But. I'm just gonna spit it out. I might actually like kids. Not a joke. Not a rhetorical question. And, to make matters worse, they might love me back. In their own weird sadistic selfish obsessive way, of course, no doubt about it, but they do want me to be there twice a week, they consider me a part of their life... A tiny-tiny part, but still. They pretend to whine about tests and quizes I make especially for them, but they keep insisting on putting their names on every test we take. Well, they take, and I bother to create, make up the interesting translation sentences and all... I do bother relentlessly, persistantly, every single week, and I may be enjoying it...) I used to wonder how there could be a room in someone's heart for every single child they are teaching, I used to think that was all false random masks, but now I have reconsidered that. Kids feel pretence. I laugh with them naturally, I just can't help it most of the time. You can never cheat a child about your feelings. You will lose. Either way. Every time I come in and see their eyes staring at me, eager to burst with new crazy ideas and unexpected questions and opinions and suggestions, I feel full. Complete. They expect me to know everything in the world, and yet they can't wait to catch me on my mistakes, and when they do, they get super-happy and excited, as if they've just eaten a chocolate cherry pie or smth. They make me furious, deranged, happy, sad, offended, they get me crying, from laughter or aggravation, they make me blush, yell, lose my mind, and they make me feel important. That's the best one of all. 6 thoughts|мнение

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